MARRIAGE WITH LITTLE OR NO SEX

You may be one of those people who felt erotic,excited and sexual shortly after you first met your mate. You enjoyed experiencing orgasm with your partner and the feelings were mutual. Life was a real dream. Now - not so much. Maybe not at all. Now you may be concerned as you realize the frequency of your sexual activity is far less than the once a week average of many couples. (General Social Survey)
The biggest mistake you may be making is comparing yourself to others and coming to unrealistic conclusions about normality. (Dr. Sue Varma - NYU Langone Health) Another error you may be making is rating your life joy on a comparability scale. If you are going to remain on that scale, however, at least be aware that about 20 per cent of couples live with pleasure in a marriage without sex. You are not sick. You are not weird. You are neither strange nor bizarre. You are YOU with your own feelings, needs and pleasures. If you and your partner both conclude that your needs are being met, having a union without sex is your own normal. You could, of course, go into a years long psychoanalysis to find out why you are content without sex. You may find out why, but, your partnership will still be sexless.
There may be many reasons for a relationship without sex. "There can be life stressors like financial struggles as well as physical changes such as weight gain or loss that can cause insecurity, and mental health issues to name to name a few.." There may also simply be many differences in what brings bliss and contentment. That is ok. Sex is ok. Lack of sex is ok. You are ok. Sex does not necessarily keep a relationship together. A sexless relationship feels normal to many people. Companionship and feelings of security feel far more important.
If you want to change a sexless marriage, I can help you to do that. If you are content with your current situation, do enjoy being unique because this is your personal preference. There are many ways for you to feel connected, bonded, intimate, desired and loved. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

"Marriage is not just a spiritual communion and compassionate embraces; marriage is also three meals a day, sharing the workload and remembering to carry out the trash."

Dr. Joyce Brothers


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